'Home is an invention on which no one has yet improved'
- Ann Douglas
The Netherlands vs The World
About a month ago I decided to go 'home', to The Netherlands, where my parents live. I am not entirely sure if this is my main 'home' as I have had many places that I called this over the last years. Also Austria is home and Berlin and I even sometimes consider New Zealand as my home. But basically: For me 'Home' is where my teddybear and my pillow are. These two items are, at the moment, located in my bed in Hulst so I guess The Netherlands is 'Home' for now.
In order to understand this post better I will have to give you some background information. Hulst is the city I was born and went to school till the age of 15, after that I decided to change and finish my high school in Terneuzen (a city 20 km away from Hulst). After my graduation I lived around many places in The Netherlands and Belgium but moved to Austria about 6/7 years ago. As you can imagine I left many people behind, friends and colleagues, and learned to be a World Citizen. The longest period of time I have spend in Hulst, over the last years, has been about 10 days. I guess you can imagine what a change it is, being here now for 1 month and staying for another 2 months. I went from a World Citizen back to an 'Abandoned by Young People City' Citizen. Back to the 'Normal' World
Being back in the city I was born in is interesting. Let's say; I enjoy the conversations with my parents and the temporary work in doing next to Bacon and Eggs Tours. Apart from that; Being back here made my think about my life more than ever. And the thought are, sometimes, shocking and there have been many moments I thought: Kim, seriously, what did you do with your life!Being here confronts me with the people that stayed here, with their marriages, their children, their relationships, their homes and houses... It confronts me everyday with all the things I do not have and makes me wonder if I did the right thing. There has never been a stronger moment in my life than now where I can't help but wonder: Is my life how I really want it?
Yes, I do not want to swap my life with any of my former class mates that have all the security of a family, home and job. I admire them for being able to cope with it, to take care of their relationships and all the things that come along with it but I, no, Im not ready for that. I might not be made for that, at least.... not now.
An Alternative Lifestyle
I have chosen, myself, all the paths I went over the last couple of years. Of course I sometimes wish I had it done a different way but I am happy with all the things I did, the choices I made because they made me into the person I am today. I might have chosen an alternative route, an adventurous route, a challenging route which sometimes worries me. But I absolutely love my life at the moment! |
| Bacon and Eggs Tours |
Never give up your dreams, they might be 'weird' to the world around you but they are your dreams. Admire them & never let them down!
